I would give him a second chance because i LOVE him!

Darian

I wouldn't give that person a second chance because that person broke the circle of trust. Why should anyone put themselves in that position anyway. The bond of trust is broken.

Rozlynn

I have already been here, I have gave him second change, why is b/c when you really love some one as much as I love Jason then you will for give them from anything. But I can see if it when people say no I will not give them another change, b/c it does hurt alot.

Crystal

If you caught your spouse cheating on you, would you give them a second chance?

No second chances		39%
Yes		22%
Only if married for a long time		6%
Only if we had kids		5%
I don't know		29%

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I did in the past and what happened? That's right, they did it again. Once a cheater always a cheater. Never again. There is no excuse in the world why someone should cheat, they never really loved you to start with.

A broken heart

Yes

Marlene

Hi

1st off, to all who´s been cheated on, I feel 4 u. U´re stronger than u give urself credit 4.

2nd I´d also look at myself, bc its what we do when things go wong in our lives. Then I´d look at my partner.

3rd could I forgive, ........................yes but my trust would be gone. I´d be suspicious n that would eat me away. In end it would be the death of it.

Now this may sound different from my reply in Giving up to Soon, not really. Look at myself, was it me that made my partner stray, if yes work on me. If no, forgive n try n repair if trust ca be rebuild. It not adios partner take a hike, go play on the next freeway.

Now that said, we must remember not just men cheat, women do it also. Just as bad n many as men does it. So i think we should take a deep breath, b4 we start raking someone down, juss bc someone said my partner cheated on me. When the word cheater pops up, many go MAN DID THAT TO A WOMAN: KILL HIM !!!! HOW DARE HE!!!!

Ever considered it may have been the woman that did the cheating?

In this I agree with the few who has said " Once a cheater always a cheater !! " Bc they didn´t gender it. Simple.

Bente 

well if you want some revenge let me know

Yes, I would if its a long time relationship. This is because like many long time relationships (15 years and above), there would bound to be some ill feelings or discontentment. Some longterm unresolved issues. Maybe one partner is feeling unhappy or feeling neglected. Usually, the partner who seek "happiness" elswhere is the one feeling the most unhappiness in the realtionship or perhaps the person is reacting to what seem to be an indifference on the part of the other partner. Sometimes its easier to say that couples should discuss and resolve whatever issues they have and to reach a compromise. This is usually easier said than done becuse both parties need to admit their mistakes and both must be sincere enough to want to resolve the problems.

However, the trouble is usually one party would start accusing the orther partner and the other partner would become defensive, so most of the time its just "stalemate"......Anyway I feel it would be a good idea to give the partner who strayed another chance in the relationship if he/she is sincere enough to want another chance because we should look at it as a cry for help. It would be a good idea to see where we have failed our partner, rectify whatever problems there is  and give the relationship a better footing this time. We must learn to trust our partner again so that he/she can try his/her best to make amends and truly regret the mistake made. It takes two to make a relationship work.

I went thorugh this during my 18th year of marriage and now its already my 26th annivesary and our relatioinship is very much closer.

"Marital Contract?"..... If all you saw it as was a "marital contract", well then it's no wonder he broke it.

Been there, done that. No Man today is faithful. Anyone who thinks their mate is, is gonna be set up for a big fall. It's better though its terrible to live this way, knowing and expecting they will wander and cheat.

I always tend to have a Plan B, so to speak so I won't be left alone. Its always good to keep your guy friends close. I made that mistake when I got married and ditched all of them. Once my hubby did his cheating numbers on me, none of my male friends could be found for support. Now I keep them close, some closer if you get my drift. Don't think they will change, they are men they won't. We gotta play their game, and beat them at it. Sorry fellas, but it's the truth.. 

NO NO NO..I did and it got worse...Played with my emotions.

Might i put a little twist on this discussion and see what you all think?  from the replies i've read it seems everyone is assuming that everyone else is in a normal, healthy, traditional relationship.  try to step into my friend's shoes for a moment...

she & her husband had a great marriage.  i was actually a little envious of their relationship.  it was very loving, very sensual, and very physical.  just 5 years into their wedded bliss he learned he had diabetes and was impotent in a mere 2 weeks time.  all physical affection stopped.  she is still a great wife and friend to him, having re-learned how to cook good meals that are healthy for him, and staying on top of his blood glucose levels and medications, keeping the house clean, and raising their 2 children.  but she is still a healthy woman.  is she to live the rest of her life in celibacy?

 i can see both sides of this issue.  on one hand, she took vows.  on the other hand, why should she suffer for her husband's lack of desire? 

 what would You do?

I won't commit to a relationship for 1 main reason. If I, Miss Enchanta Vanleer settles down with whoever! That's a great big step...f if I decide you're worth settling and giving up all freedom for and you play me by not being faithful, u might just loose a limb or your life.... I dead ass serious lol!!!

Hi everyone;

I could not help but to get in on this discussion. I have been there done that, I delt with infidelity with my ex-husband. The first time that this happened, I forgave him and tryed again, only for him to do it a second time. That was one time too many for me. Needless to say, we are no longer together. So now, in my current relationship, I would probably forgive by boyfriend, but I would end things with him as well, because I would no longer trust him, and I probably would be just waiting and looking for the next time if and when he when cheat. Just my opinion!!!!!!!

In response to "Hummingbird"

The wife should do a couple of things: (1st) She needs to ask herself, what if the situation was reversed, what would she expect from her husband in regards of sexual fulfillment. (2nd) She should at least try to sit down with her husband and explain how she feels now in regards to her sexual fulfillment. (3rd) Marriage is really something serious. If people these days, would ask themselves, the "what if" questions before marriage, divorce rates would probably drop a whole lot. (4th) I'm sure that there are some other ways for sexual fulfillment that could be considered that don't include her committing infidelity. Infidelity brings a lot of other things to the relationship to be considered and delt with, some bad and others really bad. Just some things to think about and consider.

Sunshine0320